Thursday, July 31, 2008

Truth in Advertising

While perusing the local weekly tabloid to see if they had pictures of those fab white boots Spud's been seen sporting, I found this ad*:

Successful Men Love Beautiful Women

Beautiful Women Love Successful Men


BEAUTIFUL WOMEN WANTED

We are seeking stunning, stylish, trophy-wife quality women , 30-40 years old who desire a pampered lifestyle with a man of means. Be single & serious about meeting our older, handsome & affluent bachelors. This could truly change your life!

HURRY & REGISTER WHILE THESE MEN ARE STILL AVAILABLE.
Registration is always free for beautiful women. Call today to see if you qualify.
Other programs available

The Matchmaker


Why don't they just say what they mean? Here's the truthful version:

Whores wanted for old rich guys.
Must be young and pretty and willing to screw a
nasty old dude for money.

I do love the, "other programs available," though. Like what? Quasi-beautiful women for less affluent men? Homely women for broke guys?

(*Page 57)

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Okay, THAT was freakin' HILARIOUS.

Anonymous said...

Another thought: Labor Day is coming up pretty soon...he'll have to mothball those deeeelish white boots. I mean, if he's still sporting them after Sept. 1st, there's your proof that your love was just not meant to be.

Blackiswhite, Imperial Agent Provocateur said...

Money is supposed to be an aphrodesiac...not that I'd know, or anything...