A Recap of Obama's Speech

In song:

Obama: "I'm Great and the GOP Sucks"

No, I didn't watch the Obama love fest last night. I had better things to do. However, I did read this story from the Washington Times. Here is the Gospel according to Obama:

1. The GOP is a do-nothing party.
2. Bush is a torturer.
3. The GOP sucks.
4. I am the greatest human to ever walk this planet.
5. The recession and deficit is the GOP's fault.
6. Aren't I funny when I banter about war with my sycophant press corps?
7. I'm "remaking" America.


Okay, now here's what I have to say: Screw you, Obama. SCREW YOU. Here's my view on your first 100 days:

1. 2 million jobs were lost during your first 100 days of office.
2. YOU pushed for a 700 trillion dollar budget.
3. Terrorists deserved to be tortured if it will keep us from losing another 3000 people. They aren't your Uncle Bob or Aunty Fanny. These are people who live to kill others.
4. The Air Force One photo op is the most retarded piece of crap to ever come out of the White House and that includes Clinton getting blown.
5. Your stupid-ass mortgage assistance program doesn't really help anyone because the banks aren't doing it.
6. It takes a real class act to constantly blame the previous administration for your screw ups.
7. The economy sucks. IT IS NOT GETTING BETTER, you idiot.
8. You've shaken hands and kissed the asses of every tin pot dictator on the planet so now everyone, including our enemies, thinks we are weak. Ripe for another attack because they know you won't fight back.

So in a nutshell, you are a disgrace to the office. Because of you and the idiot media that slobbers all over your genitals like a $2 hooker, I'm ashamed to be an American.

What's Hot and Not Hot

Pay attention, please:

Hot:

Not hot:

Are we clear?

WTF?

Seriously? How is it that the "media" insists all is well with the economy when me and just about everyone I know is facing homeless due to lack of employment? Are there that many delusional people out there? Is that idiot in the White House so sacred that no one will call bullshit on him? He's a snake oil salesman. A charlatan. A huckster. Yet no one will call him on the carpet.

Where the hell is my hand out, Barry? You throw money at GM, AIG, and the rest like Time Square hookers but the rest of us are getting bent over. There are no jobs. Let me repeat that: THERE ARE NO F*&KING JOBS, Barry. I went to my alma mater's job bulletin board today. It was blank. No jobs posted since March 3.

I have no steady income, no insurance, and two kids plus a menagerie of animals to support. What the hell are people like me supposed to do?

New National Anthem

The Obama Administration has decided that our current national anthem, "The Star Spangled Banner," does not accurately reflect his "Hope and Change" theme. Introducing the new national anthem:

A Song For Abbadon

Poor guy wonders what the hell is up with my taste in music. Here's another one for you:

Another Fun Song

Showing just how diverse my musical taste is, I love this song. Watch carefully and you'll see Paula Abdul, Sinbad, and Kevin McDonald from Kids in the Hall. And watch the whole damn video.

GM to Close Plants for Up to 9 Weeks

Two people briefed on the plan say General Motors Corp. will close most of its U.S. factories for up to nine weeks this summer because of slumping sales and growing inventories of unsold vehicles. Source.

Remember back in January when the asshole at Bob Douchebag Chevrolet wouldn't sell me a car unless I ponied up at least $3k in cash and paid $600/month for a Trailblazer? HAHAHAHAHA. I hope he loses his job. Try actually wanting to make deals instead of thinking this is still 5 years ago when YOU could dictate whatever terms you wanted to potential customers. I don't feel any sympathy for the auto industry at this point for overpaying their workers to make crap-ass cars that are overpriced BECAUSE of their overpaid workers.

New Fun Song

Someone...cough, cough...complained about the Spice Girls on Friday so I'm offering this up as a replacement:

Dedicated to the Ex-Boyfriend

So it's official. I'm back on the market. Or at least I'm not dating anyone. I don't know what the hell his problem is but it reminds me of this song.

And while we're on Pink, maybe I think of this song is one I need to keep in mind.

Fun Song Friday

Since everyday is now WTF? I've decided to put a more positive spin on things. Today's fun song is by the girl group that we all love to hate, the Spice Girls:

Janeane Garafolo

I went to high school with this chick. James E. Taylor Senior High School in Katy, Texas. Her dad was a VP at Exxon. Everyone whose dad was in the oil industry back then was a freakin' bitch or asshole. Oil industry kids made my life miserable because I was one of the poor kids. I was harassed and picked on left and right by those people solely because my dad wasn't some oil industry bigshot.

She knows as much about poverty and the common man as my dog. She's a freakin' hypocrite.

Everything I Need to Know, I Learned from Schoolhouse Rock

What I Want

Happy Easter

Fun Facts about Folly

Yeah, it's getting desperate when we go here. Anyway, I posted a comment at another site about me that many people do not know: I have social anxiety. Yep. I hate crowds, public speaking, and most courtrooms. Here's some other fun facts you may not know:

1. Unlike the majority of residents of my state, I have no Indian blood. That I know of. My family was pretty game about climbing onto anything with a crotch but for some reason, Native Americans aren't part of the family tree.

2. My dad was a minor league baseball pitcher. He was called up the majors but happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. His buddy decided to commit armed robbery. The buddy went to jail and Dad got sent back down. Personally, I'd beaten the buddy's ass.

3. I have been married as many times as Terry Bradshaw although not TO Terry Bradshaw. However, if he reads blogs, I'm available. I'll even sign a pre-nup.

4. I've never done illegal narcotics. Nope. The one thing my dad WOULD have killed me for.

5. As a kid, I once lived in the projects in Tampa.

6. I have 5 cats. I'm well on my way to becoming the crazy cat lady.

7. My vision is 20/220 in one eye and 20/240 in the other.

8. I am an alumna of the University of Oklahoma. Other OU students/alumni include: James Garner, Ed Harris, Van Heflin, Dennis Weaver, Rance Howard (Ron's dad), Alice Ghostly and Vince Gill.

9. Since I do live in Oklahoma, here's a list of famous people from this state: Gene Autry, Johnny Bench, Mickey Mantle, Anita Bryant, Lon Chaney, Jr. , Chuck Norris, Ron Howard, Jean Kirkpatrick, Dr. Phil, Brad Pitt, Ted Shackelford (his brother is a local vet here), BJ Thomas, and Tony Hillerman. Here's the complete list.

10. I hate martinis.

Good Friday

The Pirate Problem

Why are we negotiating with them? There's only one way to handle pirates:

Our New Theme Song

Who Has Influenced this Country?

"And we will convey our deep appreciation for the Islamic faith, which has done so much over so many centuries to shape the world for the better -- including my own country."

Barack Obama's address to the Turkish Parliament, April 6, 2009

Hmmmm, except for killing 3,000 of our people in one day, I'm not sure what exactly the Muslims have done to shape our world for the better. In fact, the Christian faith is what has shaped this country as evidenced by these quotes:

The moment the idea is admitted into society that property is not as sacred as the laws of God, and that there is not a force of law and public justice to protect it, anarchy and tyranny commence. If 'Thou shalt not covet' and 'Thou shalt not steal' were not commandments of Heaven, they must be made inviolable precepts in every society before it can be civilized or made free.

John Adams, A Defense of the American Constitutions, 1787

If men through fear, fraud or mistake, should in terms renounce and give up any essential natural right, the eternal law of reason and the great end of society, would absolutely vacate such renunciation; the right to freedom being the gift of God Almighty, it is not in the power of Man to alienate this gift, and voluntarily become a slave.

John Adams, Rights of the Colonists, 1772

Our unalterable resolution would be to be free. They have attempted to subdue us by force, but God be praised! in vain. Their arts may be more dangerous then their arms. Let us then renounce all treaty with them upon any score but that of total separation, and under God trust our cause to our swords.

Samuel Adams, letter to James Warren, April 16, 1776

"Three millions of people, armed in the holy cause of liberty, and in such a country as that which we possess, are invincible by any force which our enemy can send against us. Beside, sir, we shall not fight our battles alone. There is a just God who presides over the destinies of Nations, and who will raise up friends to fight our battles for us."

Patrick Henry

Nevertheless, to the persecution and tyranny of his cruel ministry we will not tamely submit -- appealing to Heaven for the justice of our cause, we determine to die or be free ....

Joseph Warren, American account of the Battle of Lexington, 1775

"Let us raise a standard to which the wise and honest can repair; the event which is in the hands of God."

George Washington, Constitutional Convention, 1787

With hearts fortified with these animating reflections, we most solemnly, before God and the world, declare, that, exerting the utmost energy of those powers, which our beneficent Creator hath graciously bestowed upon us, the arms we have compelled by our enemies to assume, we will, in defiance of every hazard, with unabating firmness and perseverance employ for the preservation of our liberties; being with one mind resolved to die freemen rather than to live as slaves.

John Dickinson and Thomas Jefferson, Declaration of the Cause and Necessity of Taking up Arms, July 6, 1775

The God they refer to is the Judeo-Christian God, not the Muslim god, the Hindu god, or whatever. The majority of these people were Anglican, Methodist, Quaker, and whatnot.

People Suck

I've had a crap ass day. You think the people at Sprint would sent me an Idiot-gram telling me, "Hey, moron, pay your bill before we cut you off." No. They just did it without letting me know. So I had to deal with that drama this morning. Then I find out my insurance has been terminated so no more Remicade treatments for me unless I can get on some poverty plan.

I get a copy of a local magazine and see the ex-pub in a half page ad which leads me to wonder where he got the money. He still hopes I'll drop the contempt charge and I still hope he falls of the planet.

I'm back in my old house with mixed feelings. I like being back here but it does remind me of the idiot. Plus I keep wondering when they're going to knock on my door and tell me to get the hell out. Add to that my kids being across the street inside the local drug den after I told them not go over there.

And I'm stressing like hell over money. So that leads me to wonder this: Where the hell is MY bailout, Barry? Where the hell is MY stimulus package?

That all reminds of me of this song:

A Long Long Time Ago in a Country Far, Far Away

Some 233 years ago, a group of malcontents decided they had had enough of an oppressive government. A government that taxed them to death. A government that ignored their needs and requests. Here are a list of quotes from these malcontents which I think are relevant today.

"A general dissolution of principles and manners will more surely overthrow the liberties of America than the whole force of the common enemy. While the people are virtuous they cannot be subdued; but when once they lose their virtue then will be ready to surrender their liberties to the first external or internal invader."
Samuel Adams, 1779

No people will tamely surrender their Liberties, nor can any be easily subdued, when knowledge is diffusd and Virtue is preservd. On the Contrary, when People are universally ignorant, and debauchd in their Manners, they will sink under their own weight without the Aid of foreign Invaders.
Samuel Adams, letter to James Warren, 1775

But a Constitution of Government once changed from Freedom, can never be restored. Liberty once lost is lost forever.
John Adams, letter to Abigail Adams, 1775

Government is instituted for the common good; for the protection, safety, prosperity, and happiness of the people; and not for profit, honor, or private interest of any one man, family, or class of men; therefore, the people alone have an incontestable, unalienable, and indefeasible right to institute government; and to reform, alter, or totally change the same, when their protection, safety, prosperity, and happiness require it.
John Adams, Thoughts on Government, 1776

I only regret that I have but one life to lose for my country.
Nathan Hale, before being hanged by the British, September 22, 1776

"There, I guess King George will be able to read that."
John Hancock, Remark, July 4, 1776

"If this be treason, make the most of it."
Patrick Henry, n.d.

Is life so dear or peace so sweet as to be purchased at the price of chains and slavery? Forbid it, Almighty God. I know not what course others may take, but as for me, give me liberty or give me death!
Patrick Henry, speech in the Virginia Convention, 1775

"They tell us Sir, that we are weak -- unable to cope with so formidable an adversary. But when shall we be stronger? Will it be the next week, or the next year? Will it be when we are totally disarmed, and when a British guard shall be stationed in every house? Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs, and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot? Sir, we are not weak, if we make a proper use of those means which the God of nature has placed in our power."
Patrick Henry

What signify a few lives lost in a century or two? The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. It is its natural manure.
Thomas Jefferson, letter to William Stephens Smith, 1787

Your love of liberty -- your respect for the laws -- your habits of industry -- and your practice of the moral and religious obligations, are the strongest claims to national and individual happiness.
George Washington, letter to the Residents of Boston, October 27, 1789

A Piece of Advice for the President

As everyone has heard, the Obamas are in Europe. While visiting Queen Elizabeth II, our prez gave her a pink Ipod with show tunes and a couple of his speeches. His wife then made the mistake of touching the Queen without her permission. Twice.

Who is advising these two on protocol? Borat? A freakin' Ipod for the Queen of England? Here's a letter I'd like to send to him:

Dear Mr. President:

I'm taking the time to advise you on a few protocol matters even though I didn't vote for you. I don't personally care for you but if you are going to represent Americans, I feel it's my duty to clue you in on what not to do.

1. We are Americans. We are unique. We like Ipods and movies. The rest of the world, not so much. If you chose to give a gift to a foreign head of state, make it something classy. As my friend Abaddon said, a lovely custom silver tea service with the House of Windsor crest and Presidential seal would have been a lovely and tasteful gift to the Queen. Think of decorative things like vases or historical items that represent America. By the way, handing back that bust of Churchill we were given was a slap in the face to the British. Just sayin'

2. Touching. Look, learn the customs of the people you are visiting. NO ONE touches the Queen or any other member of the Royal Family without their permission. You don't even speak to one of them until they address you first. Oh sure, our media tried to claim that Michelle "charmed the Queen out of protocol," but that's crap. The Queen just didn't want a scene. Anyway, I'm sure there is a book or something you can read about all this.

3. Learn how to speak. You may have legions of adoring fans in the US media who hang on to every stuttering word that comes out of your mouth. However, the same cannot be said outside the US so when someone from a foreign newspaper, say like the Guardian, asks you a question, don't stutter your way through it. It makes you look like an idiot and embarrasses the rest of us.

Look, we're stuck with you until 2012. All I'm saying is that you're embarrassing us more overseas than GWB ever did. You're not in Chicago anymore so learn how to act.

Folly

The Deadly Sins

Your Deadly Sins

Lust: 40% Gluttony: 20% Greed: 20% Sloth: 20% Envy: 0% Pride: 0% Wrath: 0% Chance You'll Go to Hell: 14% You'll die of a yet to be discovered STD.

How Sinful Are You?