Sunday, August 31, 2008

Tacky Moment of the Day

As New Orleans once again faces complete destruction at the hands of Mother Nature, what does Michael Moore and the former head of the DNC say? That there is a God because it will ruin the Republican National Convention, slated to start tomorrow in Minneapolis. Yes, the Almighty planned that a possible Category 4 hurricane should again hit a major metropolitan area SOLELY to disrupt the RNC. Of course, Moore later said, "Oh I hope no one gets hurt." Duh, what the hell do you think happens during at Cat. 4 hurricane, you fat dumbass?

Their complete lack of shame and their hatred of anyone who opposes them is the reason why I dislike Democrats so much.

Friday, August 29, 2008

Hypocrite Moment of the Day

Today, John McCain put the former mayor of a town of 9,000 with zero foreign policy experience a heartbeat away from the presidency. -Bill Burton, Obama spokesman

(Oh but it's okay to make your Presidential nominee a guy with no foreign policy experience? By the way, asshole, that's a former mayor and current Governor with a degree in journalism and political science. Your candidate is a former Illinois state senator...oh and coke user.)

Who Did McCain Pick?

(Edited to Add: McCain has apparently selected Governor Sarah Palin of Alaska has his VP choice. Good job, Senator.)

We're supposed to find out today at 11 am Central Time when he rolls out his choice. I hope he picked a woman. If he didn't, it will once again be two middle aged white guys on the GOP ticket which will play right into the hands of Obama and Biden.

Personally, I think it'll be Romney because the good old boy system that runs the GOP would rather lose than have one of them there creatures who have to squat to relieve themselves on the ticket. Us women folk don't need to be in government, we need to be in the kitchen. Oh my...does that sound bitter?

Yeah, it does 'cause quite frankly, I'm tired of the good old boy system and the religious right wing who think we need to regress to the old times when women just shut up and did what their men told them. This is what has led me to question my choice of religion lately. Well that, and the dumbass story that came out the other day about how Buffy the Vampire Slayer has caused women to quit going to church. I saw that show a couple of times when it was on but that had nothing to do with my church issues. If Christian churches would stop treating women like it's 1848 then maybe they'd stay. However, I digress.

Anyway, it should be interesting to see who McCain has chosen as his running mate.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

An Obamination



Anyone else see scary similarities between Obama's acceptance speech in a Greek Temple before 85,000 people at Invesco Field in Denver and another crowd motivator?


You can just hear the sounds of "Horst-Wessel-Lied ," can't you?

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

The Cult of Personality

I went to Wal-Mart yesterday to get cold medicine and meandered by the book section. One of the books I wandered by was about Obama with a sub-title of "The Cult of Personality." I haven't heard that phrase used since I studied Adolph Hitler in undergrad.

According to Wikipedia,

A cult of personality or personality cult arises when a country's leader uses mass media to create a heroic public image through unquestioning flattery and praise. Cults of personality are often found in dictatorships but can be found in some democracies as well...Generally, personality cults are most common in regimes with totalitarian systems of government, that seek to radically alter or transform society according to revolutionary new ideas. Often, a single leader becomes associated with this revolutionary transformation, and comes to be treated as a benevolent "guide" for the nation, without whom the transformation to a better future cannot occur. This has been generally the justification for personality cults that arose in totalitarian societies of the 20th century, such as those of Joseph Stalin and Adolf Hitler.

Hmmm, THAT sounds suspiciously like what Obama is doing and we see how the countries who had these type of leaders turned out. The United States does not need this type of leader and anyone who even is remotely considering voting for this guy should pick up Mein Kampf or The Obama Nation. It should frighten the hell out of anyone with a rational thought in their heads that this guy might be our next president.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Sick as a Dog

That's me. Hit all of a sudden last night and looks suspiciously like the flu. Hence no post of importance. Excuse me while I go back to bed.

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Screwed

By my real estate agent. Seems said agent sorta forgot that my sister is an agent with the same company in Florida. Imagine my sister's surprise when her broker told her that the word on the street is that I'm a deadbeat loser who can't pay the mortgage and the house won't sell anyway 'cause it's over-priced and the market sucks. Color me surprised because my agent never mentioned any of that to me. Oh and my house is listed at $21k under the appraisal. My sister kindly informed said broker that I'm not a deadbeat but an attorney in the middle of a divorce.

The extra-screwed bonus comes from the fact that had I known my agent wasn't actually trying to sell my house but only humoring me, I wouldn't have agreed to give Stubby the house or agree to a deed in lieu. I would have cut a deal with the mortgage company and rented the place out. Now I'm hosed because she was playing me.

God, I hate my ex. And my agent. Seriously.

Saturday, August 23, 2008

From the Way Back Machine

Pretty sad when these ladies are more creative that Jessica Simpson, Brittany Spears, et al combined.






Hell, even these ladies sounded better than half of the female singers out today:



(They supposedly are a knock off of the first group.)

Obama Picks Biden

Showing how clueless the Dems are, Democratic nominee-to-be Barack Obama chose Senator Joe Biden as his VP choice. If you remember, Biden had to drop out the 1988 presidential race when it came to light that he plagiarized other people's work for his speeches; plagiarized a law review article while a law student; and lied about his law school graduation rank. He was a miserable undergraduate student (getting mostly C's and D's and failing ROTC) and lied about how many degrees he received. The guy apparently has a problem with telling the truth. Then he dropped out of this race after making a comment that Obama talks pretty good for a black guy and that he cleans up well.

All I can say is that the GOP will rip Biden apart. The only worse pick for VP would have been Clinton.

Friday, August 22, 2008

My New Idol: Joanna Lumley

Before I read this article, I only knew Joanna Lumley as the wonderful drunk Patsy on Ab Fab. However, there is apparently more to her than that including being a former Bond girl. That's not what has me wishing she was in charge over there. She's actually quite bright, articulate, and full of wonderful ideas to fix society. Here are some excerpts from the article that I think makes her a cut above the usual celebrity:

"The young ones don't do anything nowadays." Her big blue eyes light up with bewilderment.

"Girls can't sew on a button or take the sleeves out of something or shorten a skirt. Obviously, it's not the done thing to sew any more, but I do. You must learn to sew. It is pretty shaming if you can't sew."


"And they [Norwegians] are very good at looking after themselves. Children don't go to school until they are six, but by the age of 11 they can speak three languages. They learn practical skills. They all sit around a fire with their teacher with vast knives and learn how to whittle sticks.

And I thought, 'Why can't we do this? Why can't English school children sit around fires learning how to use knives to cut firewood as opposed to killing each other with them?'"

She pauses briefly for breath, stirs her cup of tea, and continues. "We don't really require anybody to do anything. We have all these diversional luxuries, like iPods. Nobody gets out a guitar and sings while their friend plays the penny whistle.

You just stick something in your ear and don't speak to anybody else. I don't understand why you would put an iPod in your ear when you could be walking down the street saying good morning to someone, or listening to birdsong. Why do people have to have stuff going on in their heads all the time? How do you do your own thinking?"

She is not much more enthusiastic about society. "I just think that we ought to be doing more. It sounds very hearty and Girl Guidey but I think, particularly in our inner city schools, we expect people to do nothing, we expect people to carry knives, we expect people to be afraid.

We've gone down the wrong alley. I love the idea of having some sort of national service. Oh, God. I sound like a woman of demented horror."

Joanna could not be more different from Patsy if she tried. She was born in India 62 years ago; her father was a Gurkha and her mother was a passionate mountain walker.

In her thirties, Lumley became a fellow of the Royal Geographic Society after a trek of the Hunza mountains in northern Pakistan, and a decade ago made a documentary about Bhutan, where her grandparents lived.

Her grandfather was a diplomat in Tibet and was friends with the 13th Dalai Lama, who once gave him a selection of holy scriptures. Lumley later returned them to the current Dalai Lama, who gave her some treaties on emptiness as thanks. "He was fantastic. I support Tibet absolutely."

She was very vocal at the time of the Olympic torch protests before the start of the Bejing Games and is a spokesman for the Free Tibet campaign. If she were prime minister, she says, she would halve the prison population - "I think prisons are bad; I would have them cleaning the streets, doing useful things" - and reopen every single railway line that Dr Beeching closed.

She would ban celebrity magazines, too. "I'd burn the lot and sack all the staff." It is not really a surprise to learn that she has never had plastic surgery. "Everyone knows I am 62. It's not a secret.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

The Political, "Who The Hamster Cares?"

Yes, I'm back. No, don't ask about the move. It sucked and I'm still bringing out stuff from the other house. However, I've been keeping an eye on the political race and noticed there's just a lot of "revelations" or what have you that I don't give a hamster about. Such as the following:

1. How many houses do the McCains own? Who the hamster cares? He hasn't been the one spouting off about being one of the regular people and we all know his wife is loaded. Jeez, AP, slow news day or what?

2. McCain Has to Pick a Pro-Lifer VP. Is the GOP ever going to get off this soapbox? After seeing how people mistreat and murder their own kids, maybe we need more abortions and not less. Yeah, I said it. I don't care if the VP is pro-life, pro-choice, or pro-whatever. He just sits around and attends functions. The GOP needs to focus on more important issues like the economy and defense and get out of people's bedrooms. I couldn't give a rat's ass what goes on behind closed doors if they're over 18 so I suggest the morality police give it a rest.

3. The Obama Nation. Hamster, people. Will the press kindly stop stroking this man like a $10 hooker? He's a 48 year old one term Senator and that is pretty much his sole freakin' political accomplishment. Getting him to actually tell you what he plans to do is like nailing jello to a wall. I'm sick to death of hearing about him and what idiot in their right mind publishes their policy aims via a book? Other than Hitler in Mein Kampf.

God, I'm so sick of this election and we have 2 1/2 months more to go. However, I will be watching the debates because I think McCain will slap Obama around like it's Saturday night at the trailer park.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Russia Invades Georgia

I realize this is old news but when I first saw it I was stunned. I thought, "The Russians are invading Georgia? From where? Tennessee? Alabama? When will Atlanta fall? How did Russian troops get here anyway?" Then I realized they meant the former Soviet satellite state of Georgia and was relieved that the Braves would be allowed to at least finish the regular season.

Anyway, what the hell is up with this? Why hasn't the UN squawked louder? If we invaded Canada or Mexico, we'd never hear the end of it but somehow it's okay for the Russians to just declare war on a neighboring state. If the US is really an ally of Georgia, why the hell hasn't NATO conducted airstrikes on Soviet....er...I mean, Russian convoys? Yes, that would escalate things but the last thing we need is for Russia to think they can do whatever the hell they want. I mean, Bush is over in China having photo ops with the US Women's beach volleyball team while Russia is leveling towns. I know he's a lame duck but come on, GW. Now even I think you're an idiot.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

It Is Finished

The judge signed the decree today so I am now officially single (again). Many thanks to all of you who put up with my bitter rantings throughout the last 6 months. It's been a long haul but it's finally over.

Oh and it's time again for the, "How Long Will the Pub Last," betting pool. Put your bets in the comments section and the winner will get a Wench t-shirt pilfered from the pub or obtained from the Sheriff's sale.

Sunday, August 10, 2008

R.I.P.: Isaac Hayes and Bernie Mac

Two legends died this weekend: the incomparable Isaac Hayes and the very funny Bernie Mac. Hayes was known to us old folks as singer of "Shaft" and writer of such great soul songs as, "Hold On, I'm Coming," by Sam and Dave. The younger generation knew him as the voice of "Chef" from South Park.

Bernie Mac was a stand up comic before having his own sitcom, "The Bernie Mac Show," and starred in such films as, "Ocean's Eleven," and "Guess Who?" Both men had recently finished filming "Soul Men," with Samuel L. Jackson. (Think Jackson is starting to worry since his two co-stars died within 24 hours of each other?)

Anyway, here's a little something from Isaac Hayes:


Okay, Okay, Jeez...

I received a complaint today about my lack of blogging. Of course, as I told the person who complained, I've been dealing with a child recovering from surgery and trying to pack everything I own so that I can move next weekend. Plus dealing with the STBX's antics on the insurance check situation. However, my divorce will finally be done this week.

Contrary to this person's assertion that I'm "ruining my life," I think my life is pretty spiffy at the moment. That comment relates to the new person in my life, by the way. He's an U.S. Army officer and yes, I'm quite smitten after two days. Does that mean I'll run right out and marry him tomorrow? No. Besides, he's far more cautious than that.

So I solemnly swear I will blog more than I have recently. At least until next weekend when I'll be busy trying to figure out where I put the computer.

Friday, August 8, 2008

Schmuck of the Week

Hot on the heels of my announcement that I'm finally getting rid of my lying, adulterous spouse is the revelation that John Edwards is also a lying, adulterous spouse. The reason he's a schmuck is because he was banging his "videographer" while his wife was dealing with breast cancer. Of course, he denied it the entire time and is now denying he's her baby's daddy. Loser.

Makes me think of this song.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

August 12, 2008

The day my divorce is final.

I Meant to Do This Yesterday...

He actually signed the latest decree. The long national nightmare is almost over. So in honor of that, here's a little tune:


Tuesday, August 5, 2008

So I Heard What Everyone Had To Say...

And honestly, until today, I was leaning towards just renting the place out. However, like battle, the situation changes from moment to moment. Today, it can go back to the bank. I realized that if I kept it, even to lease it, with his sorry name still on the note that he would just continue to be the giant worthless piece of hamster excrement on the planet.

Case in point: I had approximately $14k worth of hail damage to the roof. Being the dutiful homeowner (and the fact that I pay the premiums), I called the insurance company and reported the loss. Adjuster comes out, we eventually get a roofer to look at it, and eventually I get a statement showing how much it'll cost to repair. Okay. So the insurance company cuts a check for $12k in my name, dipshit's name, and the mortgage company. Because I have the most worthless postal carrier in the entire US Post Office, anything that has both of our names on it automatically ends up at the pub. Guess where the check went?

So dipshit holds on to the check for 3 weeks because he can't figure out how to cash it. Of course, I'm waiting on it to pay the roofer. My attorney finally gets a hold of his attorney and tells him to cough up the check. So I get that check back and mail it off to Citi Purgatory where it remains.

Okay, so now comes another check for $1187 but without the mortgage company on it. Guess where it end's up? In dipshit's pocket, after I notified my lawyer of the second check. When the roofing contractor, who also happens to be my neighbor, calls dipshit about it, dipshit denies knowing anything about the roof and that there was stuff going on that he didn't know about and he didn't have the money to give him. So now contractor/neighbor is threatening a lien on the property unless he gets that addition $1187. Guess who will have to cough that up? Me.

So that motherhamster has now cost me another $1,200. I know that while he's still on the note, I will continually have to put up with his grade school, white trash antics and the only way to get him off the note is to sell, refinance (not an option) or a deed in lieu. Guess which one is most likely to happen?

Monday, August 4, 2008

Gee, I Wish I Had Something to Talk About

(Edited to add: Case in point: This story.)

Other than my soap opera life. The political scene is boring the life out of me. By now, everyone in the galaxy should know that Obama is full of crap and McCain is....well....a boring old guy who can't decide if he's a conservative, moderate, or whatever. This has to be the most boring presidential year ever. I can't even watch the news anymore on it. I wouldn't care if Obama brought Stalin back from the dead as his running mate.

Maybe I've just become that jaded and bitter that I could care less who runs the country. Let's face it, could it get a whole lot worse? I mean, Obama may talk purty and promise the sun, the moon, and the stars but unless he gets the Congress to okay it, it doesn't mean squat. Just words. Same thing with McCain. The bonus about McCain is that he's less likely to want to sit down with every piss ant dictator to "talk about the issues."

Nor do I care about Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt's latest out-of-wedlock offspring. Did People Magazine really need to pay $14 million for photos? Talk about a couple of self-important idiots.

The one thing the last six months of my life has taught me is that the world is full of self-indulgent people. When did we, as a society, get so worthless that the only thing that matters is our next fix, be it drugs, alcohol, food, or the latest celebrity gossip. No one cares about honor, duty, obligation, or responsibility. What a sad, sad world we live in. Gee, I guess I DID have something to talk about.

Sunday, August 3, 2008

Okay, NOW You Can Give Me Advice

I find myself in a conundrum. As you know, I'm moving out of the 3200 square foot custom home that the STBX and I built at a time when he was apparently unhappy and looking for the nearest exit. Since we are fighting about who should pay what, I haven't paid hardly anything towards the mortgage since he won't pay half. We are now behind by 2 months.

Here's where your input comes in. Should I:

A. Let the bank take it in a deed in lieu, thus screwing up my credit for 3 years.
B. Let the bank foreclose, thus screwing up my credit for who knows how long.
C. Try and lease it out despite owing the bank.
D. Hope to God someone buys it outright before the bank takes it

So what say all of you?

Saturday, August 2, 2008

Should I Be Bitter?

That's a rhetorical question because I feel I've earned the right. This relates to the pub drama. A few days ago, I discovered that the wayward spouse has been hauled before the alcohol licensing people for the state. These people decide who gets a liquor license and who doesn't as well as who gets to keep it.

The Cliff Notes version I heard was that he was in trouble for the bartenders having the place shut down and still drinking then not letting the police in. Yesterday, I got the details. Apparently, this is Skippy's 3rd violation with the commission and here's the story: a couple of cops, who happened to be in the area investigating a robbery, noticed an awful lot of cars out in front of the place at 5 a.m. when closing time is 2 a.m. So they look in the window and what do they see? The two bartenders standing by the jukebox with a naked woman between them. The "owner" of course wasn't there because he was shacking up with the skank du jour.

Why am I bitter? Because this is what all the hard work and sacrifice has become. Nothing better than a two-bit dive bar with a couple of losers in charge because the "owner" is trying to prove he's still a man by banging every skank that'll let him. Seven years down the drain because I married a moron with self-esteem issues.

As far as the pub goes, it's finished. They have a three strike rule and I feel fairly confident they'll revoke the liquor license. So because of 3 idiots, the place is done. By the way, did the "owner" fire these two? Nope. Just saw one's car out front (the other one doesn't drive due to being a repeated DUI offender). Why not? Because they're "his family."* Well I hope his "family" will support him when he's homeless, jobless, and broke because I'm not. I have no time for men who expect others to support them because of piss poor decisions they've made.

(*Actual quote)

Photo of the Day

This genius went on a shooting spree at a warehouse, killing two people before surrendering to police. Notice the shirt:


Friday, August 1, 2008

Surgery

Today my son had surgery. He had his tonsils and adenoids removed and a deviated septum repaired. He came through the surgery okay but apparently decided he was Joe Louis and fought a male nurse. The surgeon said that it was a tough surgery for a little boy and that I was in for a miserable week. I nearly said, "So what else is new?"

When he saw me, he started crying and telling me he wanted to go home and that he didn't want surgery anymore. It's been a long day. It'll be an even longer week. Thanks to everyone for their thoughts and well-wishes.

Friday's What the Hamster?

Today it's a very special "What the Hamster," in that I don't need news stories to make me ask that question. Nope. Just my own life. So here it goes.

1. Real Estate Agents. I'm beginning to think these people are worse than used car salesmen. I made the mistake at looking at house without her permission so she's all pissed off at me despite the fact she hasn't done squat to sell my house and the idiot sellers of the house I'm under contract to apparently can't do basic math. If your appraisal comes back at $180,000 and you're asking $199,900, guess what? You're getting $180,000. It's not my fault they're in debt up to their eyeballs and have overpriced their house. I still have no idea where the hell I'm moving by the way.

2. People. I'm sick of people, from the well-intentioned advice givers to the people who just don't get it. It's not that I don't appreciate the advice, just stop beating me over the head with it (note: this does not refer to any one individual so don't send me pissy emails). As for the people who don't get it, buy a freakin' clue.

3. Divorce. For someone who, "couldn't do this anymore," he certainly is taking his sweet-ass time about finishing it. Once again, I've made the concessions while he wants to skate. My concession-making days are over. It's time I started looking out for numero uno and if that pisses people off, so be it. Meanwhile, White Boot Romeo needs to figure out what he's going to do and fast or we'll be in trial by Thanksgiving.

4. Men. I've come to the conclusion that most men suck. Oh sure there are a few who are tolerable for short periods of time but for the most part they're lying, selfish, egotistical, arrogant assholes who don't give a rat's ass about anything but their own needs. I've discovered I'm quite happy on my own. And since we adopted 3 kittens last week, I'm well on my way to being the crazy old cat lady.

5. Kids. Oh not mine. Mine are saints (*snort*). However, they have friends that I'm convinced were raised by wolves. Retarded wolves. No manners, no respect. What the hell is wrong with parents today. If mine ever backtalked someone's parent, I'd smack 'em upside the head. And what the hell is with a parent calling my ass on the phone to bitch about her kid busting curfew? It's not my job to monitor your kid, lady.